5 Sanity Saving Tips
to Deal with Negativity
Girlfriend! Grab your wine it is time to talk!
In your mind, it is a perfect 80 degrees, no humidity, cloud free sunny day... until…(fill in the blank) shows up! She brings dark clouds and grey skies wherever she goes!
Wine is no longer enough! You need a shot of something strong. Better yet, you realize you live in a state where weed is legal, so you go find your stash of “adult candy”, so you can deal with her over the top negativity!
I know you are shaking your head and laughing, but you know I’m right! Her name probably fell out your mouth before you could catch it!
We all have that one friend or family member that we love, and she will do anything in the world for you, but damn! The glass is always half empty and you need therapy after she leaves.
I am going to share 5 Sanity Saving Tips that I use to deal with my Drama Queens, Negative Nellies and Debbie Downers.
Let’s stop and take a drink...
1 || Stay Quiet and Smile
My friends and family probably spit out their wine in laughter because I have an opinion about everything.
Let me be clear. This is something I had to learn the hard way.
Sometimes the best way to handle a Drama Queen is to let her vent and not ask any questions.
Just sit quietly and smile.
If there is no one to maintain the fire, the flame will slowly die.
It took me a long time to learn this.
Let’s be honest. You don’t want to hurt your friend's feelings, so you listen and pretend like you care.
When all you really want to do is enjoy your glass of wine with fun conversation. I have learned that if I engage, I am adding fuel to the fire for the rant to continue.
Take my advice...stay quiet and smile
2 || “Hakuna Matata”- Make this your mantra
Yes the famous Lion King song! Adopt, “The problem free philosophy!”
That friend who is constantly unhappy and makes you feel guilty for having a great life. When really, you are just taking your lemons and making lemonade.
So out of guilt, you start trying to “fix” her life, so she can be happy too. Girlfriend, trust me...her unhappiness requires prayer and therapy.
You will help her more by keeping your energy high and positive. There is a good chance that over time you will rub off on her.
In my experience, the “woe is me” mindset does not completely go away, but being around her is a lot more tolerable.
3 || Keep it 100! (aka Honest)
I attended a convention in Orlando a few years back. There was a group of women who went. We usually sat together during many of the events.
One particular woman in our group, was slowly eating away at the moral in our circle. It got so bad people didn’t want to sit next to her because she was so negative.
Since I was technically the leader in the group, I sat by her for one of our meals. It was brutal, but I tried to be polite and changed the subject whenever she started going on some negatively charged tangent.
One of our last days there we had some down time and decided to visit Disney World, “The Happiest Place on Earth”!
Well, it didn’t take long before Mrs. Negativity started up again!
I finally pulled her aside and said, “We are in Magic Kingdom! This is a magical place, so no negativity allowed.”
I set the expectations by telling her what topics were off limits and when she started being negative...I would say, “everything is magical”! This was her que to drop it. She was not happy about this, but she knew I wasn’t playing with her either.
The rest of our time there was so much better.
4 || Let Go
We all have those girlfriends that are so toxic and negative that unfortunately you have to cut ties and peace out!
If it is a family member that is harder to do, so you may just have to limit your interactions with her.
5 || Don’t be a dumping ground
I came across this book by David J. Pollay, “The Law of the Garbage Truck”
He said something in the very beginning of reading this book. That sums all this up.
“It is not our duty to absorb the frustrations, anxieties, and disappointments of other people. We were not put on earth to carry other people’s negative energy, nor were we created to burden others with ours.”
Your turn- Share what tips you have to deal with negative girlfriends?
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